25 February 2007

My Swedish Passion, Finally Requited

It began as a teenager; a long-distance crush. You were all the rage when you arrived in Woodbridge at Potomac Mills a few short years after I’d moved away to Florida. Had to see for myself what the fuss was all about when I came to visit during college, and you blew me away. Your shape. Your size. Your color. You were a cheap date, but you weren’t easy. You kept your distance, played it coy. You promised you’d come closer, if I’d only have patience. I heaved a heavy teenage sigh of longing and left you behind. But I kept my eye on you.

Ok, you’re right. It was more than a crush. If this confessional love letter is to be absolutely honest, then yes. I stalked you. I looked for glimpses of you on MTV. I followed you to Seattle as an adult when I might have realized my temptation to pack you in my suitcase and bring you home with me. You’re such a tease. Your practical side dueled with the costly price I’d have to pay for relocation. I returned to Seattle over and over again, telling myself it wasn’t *just* to see you.

You taught me in Chicago that size. does. matter. You were so tall. So wide. But my passion was still unrequited. You were still too expensive to bring back with me. You whispered that anticipation was key in any successful relationship. How many years would I have to hold myself back? My wants? My needs?

I got serious. I got my passport. I haunted you in other countries, but you’d only give me trinkets to smuggle home. The frustration was palpable. I was overcome with emotion to visit your homeland, Sverige, last year. I waved a fond “hej” as I passed you on the highway, but I couldn’t bear to visit you where you where born, where you grew up, and where you’re celebrated without equal. I denied myself seeing you, and it just about killed me.

But you didn’t lie, my sweet, Swedish lingonberry. Your sultry promises whispered in my teenage ears came true last summer. You came to ME! Not believing you to be real, this time I kept MY distance. I’m sorry for all the phone hang-ups, and the late night hits to your web site. I knew that I would be only the latest in your long string of local admirers, so I bided my time. It felt like a dream to revel in your company, to spend endless hours with you that late summer day. So surreal. I couldn’t believe you were true. I couldn’t let myself go. I stole away from you, empty handed and undone. You said you understood, that after all these years, I had to be absolutely sure that I was ready to take our relationship to the next level.

Fall. The Holidays. Winter. Just thinking of you warmed me up inside. I needed a chaperone to see you again – I couldn’t trust myself not to fall at your feet. First introductions, quiet introspection, and we left. I was jealous to realize you’d managed to work your magic and seduce my chaperone, too. They embraced you as amorously as I had all these years, jubilantly awaiting their return visit to get fully into bed and bedroom with you.

Gauntlet accepted! I could not let you have another lover without first having me. Tho’ last week was Fat Tuesday and the beginning of traditional denial cycles, this weekend found me replete. Satiated. Found. For I went the distance. I met you, pace for pace. I lavished money on you. I brought you home. You’re staged in my office, but you’ll find yourself ensconced in my bedroom this weekend. I’ll have you to myself, every day, available to the touch. You’ll contain me. You are mine. Hear me roar.

Tack, my Swedish passion, for waiting for me. Tack.

11 comments:

Kristin said...

Lacking the vocabulary to express myself, I'll just leave it at: your writing blows me away, dude.

Jenny Rebecca said...

They broke ground for one here in Orlando last weekend. I am beyond excited!! Lost my Ikea virginity in the Atlanta Ikea by the way... :o) We have photographic evidence!

CheekierMeSly said...

Aw, wish I'd been with for the cherry popping in my own d*mn back yard! Your new digs may just demand you get your lustful self back up here, as I reckon your local passion fix won't be open when you move in.

whitenoise said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
CheekierMeSly said...

Kristin, I beg to differ. I've been enjoying your vocab for a while now, since mr. pid drew my attention to yer MySpace bloggage. Would have commented and not been just a blurker, but couldn't without bellying up to the MySpace bar. Color me pleased as punch to find you've joined the wankosphere, Country Mouse! All can revel in your pith and puck from the Eggroll!

Kristin said...

Cheek--I am humbled. Seriously. Standing next to you I feel a bit like a high school math teacher in the presence of Einstein . . .

And in myspace-ese: thanks for the add : )

Anonymous said...

ooohhh..I can so relate! Try shopping after you've had drinks with sheena! The experience is even sweeter......

CheekierMeSly said...

Aw, whitenoise, I appreciated your defense. Why'd ya delete your comment?

whitenoise said...

Sorry, Cheek. At first I was trying to be funny, but on reflection my words seemed a little cruel.

Then, coming back here to fix the above, I started to think that nobody could be that obtuse and maybe I had wandered into a private joke shared between friends.

Sorry, I've been feeling a little weird lately. ;-)

Hey, I'm working on a story. Take a look and tell me what you think.... ;-)

CheekierMeSly said...

WN, I'm with you. This post and others have been crafted with much forethought and time. Others flowed quite freely. I tend to only strain in private in the w.c, not with language. Go figger.
Love the story - when's the next installment?

whitenoise said...

Your post was great. I loved the humour, I just didn't share the sentiment. [looks over at $45 Ikea bookcase in office]

"Proff" should have seen the humour and the well-crafted words as well, so the criticism seemed inappropriate as if he/she was merely struggling to neg you.

About my story... not sure. The rest of it is finished and swirling around as, uh, er... whitenoise in the back of my cranium. I'll need to find the time to translate it into something everyone else can read. Thanks for reading it. :-)