10 things I learned in Blueridge, GA during CheekWeekend:
1. Cheek peeps are fierce, but they won't get their intrepid on to pass the bubbly around en route. Not just any bubbly, mind you, but Sofia Blancs de Blancs gifted by Kimplified for housewarming with The Swede in 2004. Never quaffed, seemed apropos for it to be shared ritualistically with eggroll mavens post-Swede. Alas, we waited until arrival.
2. Front wheel drive minivans also fail the intrepid test for purchase on daunting gravel grades. Schlepping cargo in the cold sucks, but Sofia bubbly, stinky cheese from Whole Foods, and tequila lime chicken wings grilled by Carmelita can scare the chill away. Eating BlueBird Red Velvet Bingles purchased at the Family Dollar store while loitering near the airport can put the scare right back in you.
3. She who blogs first, blogs first. Even if she steals your sh*t. TamponTwinkieBlogPostStealingAsh!.
4. Don’t discount a food and its moniker’s ability to inspire motifs that won’t quit. Stinky ash cheese can get your smashmouth on. CommandoAsh, MuseabilityAsh, CatalAsh, SmashAsh, and CorkAsh … we know who you are. The Southern AshQueens rule!
5. Tarot is cool. Readings by Carmelita rock.
6. ArcherFarm’s Brie and Pear in Phylo Pastry from SuperTarget, of things to eat before you die fame, gets double Z snap approval from gourmand Sheena. That’s an official things that don’t suck seal of approval, twice over.
7. Braving the chill for the hot tub can be ill advised if the water’s tepid. Kim Crawford Sauvignon Blanc helps. Crank the temp and get in after CommandoAsh and SmashAsh cater dinner. Grilled pork, butternut squash & baby bella mushroom risotto, sautéed asparagus with hollandaise … yum. Water temp. at 102F does the trick, forcing a stand in the brisk 22F air to avoid overheating. Contrast of chill and warmth is a visceral badge of courage best worn pruny-finger proud.
8. Movement can change a woman’s whole outlook on life when party girls get old.
9. Five techno chicks in the mountains with wireless access … separating your real life from your virtual one takes discipline. And lots of wine.
10. The local Methodist bible study group finds women from San Diego and Toronto such novelties that interrupting their meeting at the local coffee shop isn’t a bother. Cheek kindred can get their major caffeine dose before roadtripping back to Atlanta. Just don’t try the muffins. They mean well, bless their dear hearts.